Charmaine Is Back Today 7/2 POD

[tazcatsdad]

Lonnie is doing just fine

<span style="font-family: 'trebuchet ms', geneva;">He and my next-door neighbor, Helen Highwater, were recently spotted sharing a root-beer float ... they were probably wishing it was one of Charmaine’s!</span>

 

[gottahaveahoove]

true

But, nobody made a float like her son, Bruce. Remember Bruce? His stage name was "Penny Candy"... doing a revue called, "Both Sides Now", clearly a showstopper, everytime!

 

[kirbyklekter]

Clearly, I missed that one.

Is Helen in town, because she didn't call me,hmmm. What gives Charmaine's Root Beer

the edge is she uses Sassafras even though it's been banned for decades. That's why

she won't give out the recipe.She doesn't want to spend another minute in the county

jail, not as long as Helga is doing time there. Bruce sharing a float, ironic isn't

it? Anybody remember that time Bruce was sharing "his self" while riding on a float

in a certain parade? Oh waiter, check please.

 

[gottahaveahoove]

THAT was not supposed to get out.

And, also, certain recipes are not for the public, either.
As far as the float, many times she was found coasting down the street, another story, another time.
Iona had a "mishap" at the hair salon. No one should get a 'triple process'.Karl, (husband of Khandyce) regularly went to window conventions,... top salesman, 3 yrs in a row. Nobody knows double hung like Karl, well, possible exception: Charmaine!

 

[kirbyklekter]

That third process

Iona tried was really a failed attempt to use the Kirby Hair Grooming Kit on herself. She hooked things up wrong in her haste to change her appearance. As a result she lost most of her scalp.She regrets not reading the instructions first. She stole a wig from Wally's World, they had a stack by the door marked 80% off "All Wigs Must Go" so she took another 20% off the price and 6 more wigs,because sales like that don't come along every day...well...

Iona was standing in line for the Ella Vator concert and a big black crow swooped down from a nearby tree and snatched her wig clean off her head. She said people in line were in hysterics watching that crow flying high and low over them and all you could see at times was this wig flying through the air.She asked the couple behind her to save her place in line while she dashed home to get another wig. Don't know how the rest of the evening went... nothing on her Twitter account.

 

[gottahaveahoove]

Well, her Twitter account

was frozen for a few days. If she doesn't behave, she might be banned.

 

[kirbyklekter]

I reminder her of that and

She said,"Ban this Twitter, I'll just take my 51 followers back over to "My Space" where I never should have left." Her new mantra is ;bring me the drama I so richly deserve.This truth.

 

[gottahaveahoove]

Drama? Are you kidding?????

Well, Her new neighbor, Hortense recently installed a hot tub, swing, gas grill, central vac, vented outside.
The noise, company, commotion over there is wild. With this heatwave, lots of friends are constantly frolicking over there. Her cousin Ed-Ghar, spends al of of time over there. He owns a limo service, and is kept quite busy.
Hortense, or, "Horty" as she is known in certain circles, loves to entertain on the patio in the backyard. She's known for her special beverages, one being her lemonade, made with peaches, always a hit.
Ed-Ghar's friends love to plat instruments, a combo, if you will. Elldyn, or is it El-Done, I can't remember, makes display cases for schools, colleges, museums, military events, etc.
You'll often hear of his displays always looking spectacular.
They were using a 'shop vac' the other day, in preparation for an early evening dinner and pool party. More on that later.

 

[kirbyklekter]

Hortense? Three words: O M G !

Truer words have never been spoken than Hortense has a past. How she got out of the "pen" this time boggles the mind. Here's a quick run down on the old girl, it should clarify some of what you've heard and some of what you will hear. At the young age of forty, "Horty" was awarded a scholarship at Wally Thors School Of Trucking. She soon gained the reputation for being the one to see if you needed "party favors" and I'm not referring to balloons or kazoos.

What does this have to do with vacuum cleaners you ask? Pssst! That's how she received her shipments from south of the border. Packed inside the smelly dirt bag of upright vacuum cleaners so full of animal dander that not even the border inspectors would take a peak inside, was her real payload. "Snorty" was her nickname on campus back in the day. This truth.

That was then,(the 80's) and here we are now. "Maybe this time" she's changed. Now Ed-Ghar's limo business has always been a front, as in front office fake.

Ell-dyn, bless his heart. Grew up in Clyde, a town of 19 where he stood out as the "One to watch." Well,someone read to him that they were hiring at the Chippendale Furniture Factory. Unfortunately they didn't read the bold print, and he thought the ad was for a Chippendale dancer. Armed with an ego the size of Texas, he shows up for the interview dressed for the part.He put the view in interview that day.They hired him anyway as a greenhorn, he was a fast learner and that's how he became one of their finest furniture builders to this day.

I heard her peach infused lemonade is quite tasty no doubt it is, but I caution you right now, don't drink the Koolaid! I was invited to this next party coming up but the fact she ordered 6 wheel barrels in advance is a real head scratcher so no, can't make this one. Waiting for the reports is giving me life for sure.

 

[gottahaveahoove]

The school of trucking!!!!!

Well, she does like her big rigs. She's a 'household name' at the truck stops, for sure! Yes, she spent a little time at "Camp Cupcake", making friends with many.
That peach lemonade has undergone several "morphs' over time. Still, folks still return for more and more.
That 'limo service'. well, some called it a 'shuttle'.Chippendales!! Well, she DID know that one 'dancer', he was a 'private dancer: a dancer for money". He had a hard time 'making change' at times. Oh, it's all too wicked. I can't repeat some of the stuff. SO PAY CLOSE ATTENTION THE FIRST TIME!