Being born early enough to see Sears greatness...
I too had a mother who would not necessarily LET me go over to the appliance department or the vacuum/sewing department at Sears Roebuck and Co; but she sure as hell knew where to find me, when she'd look over her shoulder to find me NOT where she told me to stand. Man the warmed up bottom, and fingernail in the arm marks I used to have.... YEEEEEsh....
My oldest memory I have with a full cast and charachter scene, of Sears's vacuum department is from about 1982-83 ish. I've asked my poor mother, whom I scared half to death, and she seems to think 1982. It fits right to what i clearly remember so... If you wish, close your eyes and kinda picture what I can describe was a nirvana of sorts for a little vacuum dude, and what I consider the end of the golden age of department store vacuum departments....
***WARNING****IF you aren't interested in the long read, this is a good time to scroll down, or take out the garbage. I have a pretty clear memory so this gets a bit graphic and long..
I finally had an opportunity to sneak away from my mother, who was pretty busy helping the camera-man at Olan Mills who, IIRC was trying to get my brothers picture taken. Jeff wouldn't smile, he was pouting, being a brat etc.... I think to myself that he's a freaking idiot, and I hate him, so this act of rebellion by him; well was kinda genius. My pictures were already taken, the horrid ones of us both together, in the forced loving poses, we ALSO already done. THANK FREAKIN JESUS.. I think ahead, and concoct my only opportunity to run, and in doing so leaving the little front "sitting area" I was espressedly told to STAY in. Yep, that didn't happen...
The next clear vision I have is my little five-year-old ass tearing down the main aisle, running away from Olan-Mills, and the dual exposure, happy family memories...RUNNING... like I'm running to the then popular song "Chariots of Fire". I round the bend by the candy counter, where we came in...with the now remembered promise that if I was GOOD, I could have a small bag of candy.. and it still NOW smells of heaven. I'm not getting any candy now I think....Yet, that doesn't EVEN deter me in the SLIGHTEST. I am on a mission, that will have a painful ending. But OH the thrill I have RIGHT now... Finally I see it on my left... And I skid to a stop in my little Buster Browns...gazing ahead at a now long dead Nirvana, and a memory to share......
I slowly approach the vacuum department, from my skid-stop. Why, I dont know to this day. I wasn't sneaking up on a lion.... and suddenly there is the faintest scent of lemons in the air. That is because this Sears really likes to show off it's lemony scented rug-and-room carpet powder deodorizer, when they demo their vacuums.. It hits me good about the time I step onto the red carpet that is under the whole department of sewing machines, and vacuums. I think to myself that in nearly every Sears I've been too, that I'd see the sewing machines on either side of the vacuum department, ALWAYS. Our Sears has them on the left side of the department, separated by a little lattice half wall with a walkway in the middle of that to go between the departments. Clearly too much effort was required to go about 12-15 ft around this little lattice wall...I think to myself HOWWWW cute, NOT!!
I'm not going to pay too much attention to this side, I told myself. However, to the few sewing machine fanatics there may be who will even read this; there were ALWAYS sales-ladies over there doing something (NEVER men). Today it was as I remember, there they were demonstrating the newest in their sewing machines, using some fabric called "polyester". I notice that a few ladies are sitting around a low, long table surrounded by comfortable looking desk style chairs. These machines on the table were the portable style, like moms. The other machines were in wooden cabinets, these were usually sitting at the front-and-center of the department. Usually topped by the TOL and high end sewing machines.. Usually with the lights on them on, and ready for anyone to "sit-and-sew". I thought about the times mom needed to come here for her Kenmore sew-er, and how i'd get to look over at the vacuums. Today tho, as usual, these same women were mindlessly chatting along doing various things. Much like they were at a local coffee klatch, gossiping and whispering about this and that....
As I watched, I quietly laughed to myself thinking of my dad saying: "the sound of a bunch ah WIMMMEN running their yappers, is like a slow country song from hell"... I quickly came back from that memory... to hearing the faint hum, I see the stitching happening...DIIIING DING DING ding...the department store tones are letting the employees know about something in code. It stops... MAN I got too wrapped up in those sew-er's I think!
TIME IS A WASTING CHAD my mind says...lets get to the vacuums!!!!!!! You know that SOON she's gonna see I'm gone!! And soon she will be on the hunt for me...not in the waiting room where she left me, man im in deeep DEEEP DEEEEEP!!!
I look back into the vacuum department. FRONT and center is the TOL Kenmore Power-Mate Canister vacuum, now featuring the new Wide-Sweep, Double Brush, Beater Bar agitator. There is a pic of it matter-of-fact , up in my avatar.. I think then about when I first saw it in the catalog, and how I DREAMED about owning one. And how modern that Power-mate looked after the older boxy series from before. I see a placard nearby, showing a picture of this newest agitator, describing it's features.... I see right next to the canister; sets a TOL Twin Fan upright, Self-Propelled. The bag and trim was black I want to say, was black, maybe blue... Gosh memories are funny like that.. BOTH are plugged in to their own floor socket, and are ready to rumble as soon as a prospect hit the carpet. Nothing is on now, but soon there will be some action. You only see one sales-guy at the back talking to a lady.. he pays you absolutely no mind. Im standing on a multi floored section of the showroom right now too. Four different levels of carpet, and one linoleum/tile/wood area was out there to demo the FINEST Sears offered.. Sand and kapok are under my feet crunching....
I notice also off to the RIGHT, it wasn't there last time, it was on the LEFT; is a small rectangular, RED carpet island. Atop that was ANOTHER TOL upright and canister UNUSED sitting well displayed, next to where the tile floor area begins to the major appliance department. I glanced at my little Casio watch, I've only been gone about three minutes..."times a wastin". Behind the litle riser I see several of these TOL canisters, and uprights in ready-to-take-home boxes...
Ohhh Dammit...I forgot to pick up one of the tri-fold brochures laying there on the little island, spread out fan shaped in front of the display machines for easy take-home-to-savor. Oh well.. And man oh man, it was the brochure for the ENTIRE LINE of Kenmore vacuums too. WHY AM I SO STUPID!!!! Later I will kick myself for this.
Beyond these off-set TOL units, in the dead center of the department, I see the LONG bi-level riser, which is dual sided loaded up with all the OTHER vacuums.. There on the left side, are ALL the other Power-Mate square bodied machines. ALL the models I've seen in the catalog ARE RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF ME!!! My heart is just RACING as I quickly peer all of them over... WOW, I see that each are displayed with their price card, all the tools, some are already plugged in to a power-strip along the middle of the riser. That's interesting I remember..In the middle, or the center of the entire length of that riser are power plugs two at a time all along... to use to demonstrate at a moments notice; any of the Kenmore vacuums. Neat!!!
Now I look and notice that, from the front to the rear of the department, the models go from MOST expensive, to the VERY least. And, the least expensive usually looks like hell, today is no exception I think. I notice that the bag is out of the poor canister, sitting next to it with dust and kapok coming out of the bag opening..some is spilled on and in the machine. I actually put it back on the red bag throat holder, and close the lid. I used my hand to sweep the dirt off the top...
Jeeze Louise!!! The wand isn't together either, and the tools are all scattered.. Hmnn..even missing pieces?? I put together what I could. First the PLASTIC wands together, button lock I notice. Then I put that in the little boxy Power-Mate, and clipped the cord from the "mate" into the little channels in the back of the wand. And put the hose handle into the wand. I plug the Power-Mate cord into the long outer cord that goes along side of the hose down to the canister part. Continuity is even important to a 5 year old.
Not to worry I think, looks good now I think to myself proudly...I also remember that "those are ONLY a sale saver"!!. I had heard the sales-guys call it that in a previous visit. That time, it was OKAY to look at them, the vacuums. Mom was with me that time... Man I'm in SOOO dead.. My mind thinks... I think a bit more about that conversation those salesmen were having, and their discussing among themselves as I eavesdropped; that, in fact, they don't even WANT you to look at a BOL machine.... They dont make much money selling them. They grumbled in my earshot on how some customers were only wanting the CHEAP vacuums in the circular. I thought the BOL was kinda neat. And sold for right around a hundred dollars then....I scanned along the entire line of Power-Mates, and they were in a price-stepped line-up as I had mentioned. The few suction only machines were separate. I remember that there were only three or four in the catalog. These machines were at the far end of the riser on a lower tier, the "suction only models", sitting on that lower riser, facing the back wall. This riser that holds ALL these machines is pretty wide, so they fit just right back there... They never like to sell you those either, I now remembered. In fact, I hear the salesman, the one I saw when I arrived, smoothly up-selling that nice older lady he was talking to. I hear him say: "EVEN with JUST rugs ma'am, you need a POWER-MATE to get them TRULY clean"!!! I scanned a small , tall, circular rack with the Electric brooms hanging around it. Even at the age of FIVE I knew that they were Sears badge, Regina Electrikbroom's. Great-Granny had a Electrikbroom hanging on her back hall wall. And yep one of the models I see now is hanging there just in a different color, and says Quik-Sweep...eh, these don't really interest me much..
Glancing behind me, I now see he had slowly moved the lady back to the side with the Power-Mates, even in 1982, both walked by me like I didn't even exist. He quickly selects a unit off the long side of the risers; a model a few up from the bottom of the line. I found it strange, yet interesting that he chose THAT model....I mean it was pretty barren... It was austere really...: no headlight, no covered tools, but has the older square body Power-Mate with the weird wheel type rug adjuster. The colors of this machine he grabbed are a creamy beige and dark brown, almost black trim... maybe it is black come to think of it. Definitely creamy beige was the main color for sure , so far my memories are holding.... I then think of how that was the similar to the one that grandma purchased in 1979. Her's is two tone blue with the wood-grain top and the same trim on the Power-Mate. Her wands are metal tho, I think to myself, and how much sturdier they seem. Her tool lid cracked and is now missing...
My focus quickly comes back to the demo. The lady says with some reservation,and a wave of the hand gesture.."WELLLLLL...I am NOT comfortable with those "pipes" being that plastic" she gestures to the two models he had skipped...I see him in seconds, go over, and he violently throws down that wand to the BOL machine on the floor. The one if you are still awake...the one I had just fixed..and said, yep that thing is JUNK!!!! He swiftly continued.."well this model we have here that we are looking at...has the sturdy METAL wands ma'am...He attention was back on the Middle of the line machine..He finally put the handle-grip in her hand and says....to her matter-of-fact over the roar of the motor "SEE how WELL this POWER-MATE cleans the carpet ma'am"...
As she continues to push it back and forth, I watch intently. Someday I think, I'm gonna sell these vacuums to people... My thoughts then go to that I had earlier noticed that THIS model was already plugged in and ready to go. The sales-guy has them set up perfectly I thought to flow his customers as HIGH as they would spend. I also noticed, that this one was a machine featured in the last newspaper circular for $179.95. She seemed happy with this selection, and is paying attention and still is vacuuming... Hopefully she goes home with a new vacuum. I wish it was me I think.
You look at your watch, oh shit FIVE MINUTES have passed...I quickly move over to the other side of the same riser, and there were ALL the TWIN FAN built uprights of various levels all out and ready, you see the all white BOL model, with the BLUE color KENMORE going up the side of the bag.... The cream and orange trim model catches my eye tho. I run my fingers over the funky striped orange and cream bag. Then my finger traced around the wide sweep HEADLIGHT, I fingered the hood switch between HIGH and LOW speed.. THIS is the machine you would pick and still to this day pine for. I even notice that they had the rugged chrome, and black with red trim COMMERICAL down at the end with the new TOL Self Propelled Unit....I liked that Commercial model tho. It looks like the orange and cream one I have my hand on the grip of. This is the one I keep asking mom to buy to replace our STUUUUUUUUUUUPID Hoover with. My my my little mind...sigh..
I remember back to that same last circular, that this model was featured in it too. I notice that it is plugged in!!! Should I?? no...better not.....I look at the tag...Yep, it's still for sale at $119.99 WITH THE TOOL SET!!!!... I know already that to make it go, I just have to release the handle, I look around again.....the now TWO salesmen are busy with adults, the one guy with the nice lady from before; and this other one now, who was NOT there for the last few minutes, he's an older guy too I think...(NO WOMEN HERE)!!! Again,( he must have been on a coffee break), but is now working with a new couple at the front of the department... And guess what!!! They are looking at the TOL Power-Mate canister... I'm intrigued..but damn this BEAUTIFUL Twin-Fan.... I get up the nerve FINALLY!!! I slowly let the handle down and RRRRRAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRrrrrrrr. I quickly put the handle back up..GOD DAMN that thing is loud I think to myself... Glancing in two directions quickly...No one notices you at first...Whoops spoke to soon...NOW the older sales-guy eyes you now with a cold glare of "don't touch it again"!!! Yikes... You better watch it..
I quickly move further to the back, where on another separate riser at the very back near the slat-wall was an area containing ALL of the available Sears Spray-Mate Carpet cleaners. They are cream and brown this year. I think to myself, that my step-mother has the white and BLUE version of the TOL model; now,only a few years old. It's noisy as HELL too; and leaves the floor rather wet. I also quickly scan the twin brush scrubbers behind those resting on a tile, linoleum and wood flooring similar to the one in front area of the department. Looking over that rear slat-wall which held all the bags and belts, for both Kenmore and "other brands". I know you could get bags for a Hoover Convertible there. Mom had purchased them here once or twice before. She usually go them a K-Mart.. Oh well..There were also parts hanging up and in bins that one could buy also. For example, a replacement crevice tool, or a new electrified Power-Mate hose in 6 or 9 ft lengths.
Now I've seen all of it I think to myself...now I look, about 9 minutes have passed. Still no mom....with the DEATH ANGER in her eyes, and a belt for your bottom when you get home... then I hear the creme de la' creme come on... I see looking towards the front the awesome canister STILL being demo'ed... The headlight is on... I forget again ANGRY mother.
I walk to the very front of the display area, the TOL Power-Mate canister is being demonstrated on the multi-level carpet area I talked about earlier.. The salesman quickly again shoves the handle end into the missus'es hand. She guides it onto the RED deep pile carpet.. It's a noisy nozzle, but man it cleans SWEET I think. I get to watch, as sand, hair and kapok just disappear under the whiny-roar of the NEW WIDE-SWEEP Power-Mate. I notice that he stops her to demonstrate the rug pile selector... showing her that the nozzle would push easier, if she just adjusted the multi-stepped PILE pedal...of the Power-Mate. He then unlatches the Power-Mate wand, and grabs a separate wand that was nearby which had on it the great bare floor tool...The salesman went on, to show his customers the hidden tools, and that with the wand and the LONG hose on the machine, milady could reach her highest, farthest corner, and miss nothing. Oh and, the 9ft hose is a TOL exclusive. Makes it FAR easier to use. She look over wantingly at her husband... He nods, but nods towards the salesman to keep watching the demo...
SUDDENLY, I feel NAILS digging DEEP into my arm, with a quiet hiss of COMe with meeeeeeeee......younnnnngggggggg mannnnnn... Dammit, I am done for. WHO said you COULD LEAVE where I left you.. I point back towards the vacuums as she hauls me away from nirvana. I say...lemme just go back for a brochure... Mom hisses...you don't NEEEEDDDDDDD a bro-shuuure. You little A** is grass when we get to the car.
And that my dear friends, was a trip to Sears, about 1982. I was FIVE. And yes I have a crystal clear memory of it to this day. Hope you stayed awake. It's nice to reminisce.
Chad
Image one is the Kenmore Upright I speak of... And the canister.
