Old "Stink Bombs"

[mercuryman73]

I thought I'd start a funny thread discussing some of the adjectives that some "friends" of mine have used to describe my vintage Electroluxes. Of course, many do appreciate them--especially the machines that are in pristine condition--but some of my more "seasoned" (a.k.a well-worn) vacs have been called a few things which I'd never consider them to be.

First, when my sister's plastic Sanitaire vacuum (which lasted only a few years) began blowing sparks out of it, she junked it and I offered her one of my vintage 'Luxes. Her response? "I don't want one of your old stink bombs in my apartment!"

So, "old stink bombs" is one derogatory term, here are a few others:

"old relics"
"toe-breakers" (meaning that the machines are heavy and, if you accidentally drag them over your foot, they will break your toes)
"dust-belchers" (since they have no HEPA filtration)

Anyone have any terms to add that you've experienced people mentioning with regard to your vintage vacs?

 

[kenkart]

I have a standard reply!!

Someone once told me they didnt know why I wanted an old dust blower... to which I replied, Some of us have good taste..and some dont!LOL.

 

[cb123]

Old coffee can Hoovers, I've heard called, " The electric chair on wheels " or " Ole Sparky!" The piano wire around its roller brush, I've also heard called, " The finger kwizine art " or " The salad shooter " only it's not salad it's shooting but more of a bloody puree. Old Bee Vac's with the exposed terminals on top are, otherwise, known as the " Tingler " or " The high jumper " because, that's what your going to be doing, if you ever accidently brush up against it. Of course, with some of these old beauties, you will have to exercise some caution, as well as common sense , because, they will curl your toes and fry your thighs, and that's no lie. Didn't the Germans use to string piano wire across the roads for the Allies during the occupation? And I must say, I really get upset when you acquire a vac. from a numbskull, who instead of cleaning the dog crap up the usual way, comes up with a brainstorm - more like a seizure - and the genus vacuums it up and leaves it to mummify - Oh, MYYYYYY!!! The worse thing I ever found was a hand held Kirby Vacuette stuffed, NO, filled to the gills with cigarette butts, hair, and ever bodies favorite...give me a drum roll please, DOG CRAPPPPP!!! I think concrete would have been easier to chip away and not nearly as fragrant. What's the worse thing you've found in " The dust bag filled with...Horrors? "

 

[sonnyndad]

Insults...

If someone told me my machines were "stink bombs" or some other insult, I'd punch them in the face.

 

[dustin]

I once trash picked a Kirby Classic III that had been used to vacuum up cat litter- Used cat litter! Nothing wrong with it except that it absolutely reeked. I washed the nozzle, brushroll, bag, and emptor, and it doesn't smell at all. I also hate getting vacuums that smell like dog or cigarette smoke. Dog smell can most generally be removed, but not always the case with cigarette smoke.

 

[Anachronism]

We use a Kent "Quiet Jumbo", which is as properly descriptive a name as any: It can almost silently suck a golf ball through a garden hose, and weighs around 70-80 Lbs.

 

[jaker15]

neat!

How quiet is that Kent?

 

[Anachronism]

I can carry on a normal conversation with little difficulty while using it, which I consider remarkable compared to newer machines

 

[tolivac]

I end up with the vacuums that smell like stale dog!!I manage to get the smell out by replacing bags and filters and use deodoerizers.

 

[anthony]

i once

got an Electrolux z65 in for repair it had a dead hamster in its bag when the owner came to collect it i mentioned the hamster all she said was oh we all wondered where that went

 

[briankirbyclass]

Ive heard Rainbow (Sales People) used to call a Kirby or Hoover a "Dust Pumper" or "Dirt Belcher", or "Like trying to push a dust belching furnace across the room".

Kirby sales people used to call a Rainbow a "Mud Pumper" or a "Mud Jacker".

A friend picked up a metal base 70s Hoover Conv. out of a dumpster behind a bar once,,brought it home, and fired it up,, come to find out the insides were caked and corroded with YEARS WORTH of human VOMIT,and URINE,,and NOT just a little.
Bet that was a lovely fragrance comming from the exhaust!

 

[ctvacman]

Moth balls

Have got to be the worst thing so far , I'm still trying to get rid of the smell thankfully it's slowly going away. Cigarette smoke and musty basement smell is bad too. I once got a g6 from a vac dealer on eBay who said they cleaned the bag, when I turned it on my eyes were watering and I was sneezing like crazy because the inside was coated with car hair. Mind you I'm not that allergic to cats but that's the only time I've ever vacuumed that it caused that kind of reaction haha.

 

[electrolux137]

.
.

You've smelled moth balls? You must have had quite a time getting his little legs apart!

ba-DUMP-bump *krrsh*

"But seriously folks..."

cheep-cheep-cheep go the crickets...

"I'll be here all week..."

 

[electrolux137]

.
.

P.S.: I like the scent of moth balls -- reminds me of all the little old ladies who used to use them to keep their fur coats safe from the ravages of hungry moths.

And isn't it funny ... all those moth balls and moth eradicating attachments must have worked. There was a time when every vacuum cleaner, no matter how humble, had some sort of moth-killing apparatus among its attachments and frequently was a key selling point in the demonstration. Nowadays, I can't think of a single modern vacuum cleaner that has this feature.

 

[jade_angel]

Out of idle curiosity, what was the last Kirby to be sold with a de-mothing tool? I don't remember hearing it mentioned when a Kirby salesman was trying to convince my dad to buy a Heritage II (IIRC) in 1987, and my Heritage II Legend (which has "all the tools", though really only the major ones) doesn't have one. I'd guess it was before that era, then.

Filter Queens used to have 'em, too, but I'm not sure when they stopped making them, either.

 

[jfalberti]

I think the Crystalator was discontinued

during the Tradition's run.  It was still called a cystalator in the Classic III's manual, but was called an air intake nozzel in the Traditions manual.