Oh John, don't even go there! 

Just ship me your finest HOOVER, I'm sure that's fair trade.....
Only kidding! Just post a picture of your finest Hoovers, that seems fair! Be sure to include private label machines, especially Montgomery Ward! 

And P.S- you expected dirtyness when there's Hoovers about? Even the chat stays spring-fresh thanks to the patented 'beats, as it sweeps, as it cleans' action! Remember, 'HOOVER', fine appliances around the house, around the world, around vacuumland! 