Scott, I wouldn't tease about the Hoover SteamVac too much there! I had a base model from 1996, a F5805, the one with the red hood, stationary brush and no port for the tool hose, for many years. It was a GREAT cleaner! Did a excellent job on any carpet I cleaned with it. Could have used a little more suction power, but it did the job well. The only reason I parted with it was the motor finally went bad around 2013, and no replacement motor was available.
Also, many collectors hold this original model & design as the best Hoover SteamVac the company has ever produced I might add.